Day 2

So many things have been going on that I've shut down. When loved ones needed me to pray for them the most, I've selfishly ignored them to live in denial. I can't take all of this at once. These are problems that can't even be solved. When I needed to go to God the most, I ran away. There was a sermon a couple weeks ago about opening up to u're bro's and sis's and sharing what's going on, sharing u're stories so that they would recite it back to u later and remind u of what God's done. I just can't get myself to share. One of my many problems. I don't allow myself to trust people enough to share deep personal things. I'd rather listen to others problems than share my own. I stick to shallow topics and shallow things in fear of them telling someone else without my permission. All closed up and things just keep piling. I should be letting it all down at God's feed, but I hold it all in. The tears, the pain, the frustration all built up inside. I'm ready to let it go.

God, it's always been in u're hands. Even if i don't trust other people, i trust u. Just need to keep reminding myself that u're timing is perfect and u're plans are beyond what we can imagine.